Hi friends and family,
I know that stretches between my blog posts keep getting longer and longer. I have been struggling with what to write in an update, trying to think of the positives instead of just sharing every week from my heart like I used to. So I’m going to try to get back into doing that every week as my goal for this year, without or without the pictures, as upbeat or depressing as they might be, though lack of electricity and internet can sometimes be a bit of an obstacle here in terms of weekly blogs so they may be less frequent. :)
So yes, for those of you who didn’t already know, you can probably guess that that means we are back in the DR for another year. Here’s what been going on in the past few months since my last blog:
We had a good end to the JCS school year despite some of the hard times you’ve all read about already. The last month of school was full of celebrations, long hugs, and some sad goodbyes, especially to two of our favorite couples – Tim and Laura & Mark and Kristina, two couples who have been such great friends and amazing blessings in our lives down here. Dave put on an art show displaying his kids’ best work from the year, we had an end of class celebration with my English class from church, my girls’ dance class put on a spectacular recital, we had an end of the year reward trip to McDonald’s and the zoo with my OANSA class at church, and a glow in the dark dance party and water day with the firefighters for the last day of school. Dave also threw me another magnificent birthday party with colorful decorations and the neighbors, especially kids from church, filled our apartment with loud Dominican laughter.
We flew back to Michigan on June 14th for the summer. Dave got a job working at his old workplace Velocity in Grand Rapids for the summer, and I lived with my dad in Troy, while “working” as assistant for my dad’s new girlfriend Debbie who is an occupational therapist. I say “working” because it was more hanging out, having fun together, and her being my own therapist than anything else. She works with clients with traumatic brain injuries and spinal cord injuries, who have some of the most inspirational stories of love, strength, and perseverance I’ve ever heard. I can’t say enough how much of a blessing she has been to me and how happy I am she is becoming a part of our family. I also was able to meet my new niece Zoe, who is full of smiles and who I fell in love with just as quickly as my other adorable nephews and niece, just one of many reasons that made me want to move home to Michigan more than ever. I also was able to stand in my beautiful best friend Melissa’s wedding in August and take part in all of the wedding festivities – from bridesmaid dress shopping to the shower to bachelorette party scavenger hunts to a glittering carnival celebration of a Panamanian-American wedding reception. That said, this summer was not the easiest one. I think the longer I am with Dave, the harder it becomes to live without him. Though they say absence makes the heart grow fonder and prior to summer I envisioned romantic weekend reunions that made the time apart all worth while, it just wasn’t all that glamorous and being apart really took a toll on both of us and our marriage. Keep in mind that for all of the 9 years I’ve known him, my husband has hated talking on the phone – easy to deal with you live together, but not so much for long distances. But thankfully I have family and friends who support and love me unconditionally, drop everything they have going on to tend to my needs, listen, and pick up our relationships just where I left them even after two years away and I couldn’t be more grateful for that. The longer I am away, the more I realize how much I want to come home to these special people who will always be a huge part of my life.
To be honest, coming back to the DR really wasn’t anywhere in my plans for this upcoming year. I applied for teaching jobs in Michigan, contacted Michigan adoption agencies, investigated getting back into refugee foster care, drooled over American houses up for sale, and even starting researching the world of travel again with the funds I would have from an American job. We even interviewed to help with developing a new orphanage in a Mexican border town that our friend John Shinsky started (which is amazing by the way and so worth supporting if you want to check out this amazing youtube video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T8PBmUqkDSI ). But when push came to shove, I found myself shoving beanie babies, classroom decorations, bottles of contact solution, and all the other American goodies we can’t find down here into a suitcase and fighting tears as I boarded the plane. Sometimes in the world of missions, plans aren’t as clear as they appear from the outside. Decisions are tough. Sometimes two spouses have two hearts yearning for two different things. Being far away from each other and not being able to talk enough complicated things this summer a lot more. And while there has been a bit of kicking and screaming on my part, the most important thing is that we’re together again now here. My friend Johanna showed me the cutest video on youtube the other day of a father and daughter singing a song together called “Home is wherever I’m with you.” (see here http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L64c5vT3NBw – I am in love with it) and I think that even though it’s cheesy, it is the truth. So we are home because we are together again – even if it’s not the home I want to be in. And though this transition has been a tough one, I can say it does feel so good to finally have my husband back again and I could never imagine being married to a more amazing person and there isn’t anywhere I wouldn’t follow him to.
So about this transition…. While we have definitely been warmly welcomed back by friends, neighbors, fellow teachers, the kids, the gorgeous mountain scenery, and delicious avocados and mangoes that I’m so thankful are now in season and that I have been devouring non-stop, we have been hitting some road bumps.
While we thought finding a dogsitter with three German sheperds himself who was willing to care for Santa in exchange for free summer rent in Jarabacoa was a God send, I think he may have just been sent from somewhere else. I think Santa did more damage than Hurricane Irene could have, and we have added up around $700 in damage so far, including two dining room chairs, our IKEA living room chair, an air mattress, our curtains, over 30 DVD’s, and many more miscellaneous items. Santa was sickly skinny and she has developed a new habit of pooping and peeing in the guestroom as that is where she seems to have been shut in all summer to do it. No pictures this time of all the damage because we had an angel of a friend come over to kick the dogsitter and his girlfriend out and clean up who knows how many days of poop, pee, a bajillion other destroyed items, and even used condoms stashed underneath our bed. We are still finding Santa’s summer destruction, even things like dishes under my bookshelves?! Okay I’m done talking about that, cause my friends here know I could go on foreeeeeever with this topic.
Shortly after arriving back, we were also told by our landlord that we were being evicted from our apartment, which was not a big surprise considering what our apartment looked like and must have smelled like this summer while we were gone. We have been looking and looking with no luck so far and have to be out by next week.
I met my class and while they are all precious little 6 year olds, they are a challenge and a half. While 19 kids doesn’t seem like a lot for a first grade class in the states, they fill the classroom and many don’t understand one word of English. And while I get so frustrated with them for just not sitting quietly sometimes, I try to put myself in their shoes. What if I was 6 and sitting in a desk for over 7 hours for the first time in my life (not tables or carpet areas like an American classroom), unaware of the clock and how it works, asking over and over and over is it time to go home yet, while some strange foreign woman stood at the front of the room talking and singing in a language about as familiar as Mandarin Chinese is to me – would I listen? Well, maybe, considering that at age 6 I was still a pretty perfect kid, but probably not. Oh and I think I forgot to mention that the curriculum and kids’ workbooks were shipped late and haven’t arrived, and I had all of one day after hitting the ground to unpack and get my classroom set up before starting teaching (thank you to all my friends, teacher aide, and husband who helped!) And I really can’t complain because my husband has an empty classroom with no furniture, and the 3 year old classroom has 20 kids, can you imagine that? Luckily they are fabulous teachers who I know will get by. Oh the joys of teaching in the DR.
Today I’m sitting home from work with a spider bite and my foot propped up trying to self-diagnose online as I often do here (though it IS healing on it’s own, yesterday I couldn’t walk and today I can, gracias a Dios :). Just another road bump in our less than 2 weeks back.
I know I shouldn’t complain. I know we are so blessed. I can see that everywhere around us, especially here, that we have been granted with so much. But for the first time I can remember, I am really homesick (home referring this time to the imaginary one I dream of back in Michigan that doesn’t exist yet). I miss my friends and family there. I miss hot showers. I miss being able to get in my car and drive to go buy something right when I want it. I miss being able to afford buying a box of Cinnamon Toast Crunch. I miss going to the chiropractor and the movie theatre and yoga classes and to Panera Bread. And the truth is more than anything else in the world, though I love the kids I teach and minister to here, I just want my own kids at home with me – whether from my own belly, from a teen mom who can’t care for it, from the foster care system, from an orphanage in Africa, from a refugee camp on Burma’s border, or all of the above, I am just so ready. Someone was right when they said that after a miscarriage you see pregnant women and babies everywhere. you. look. I still cry my eyes out every time I get my period each month. And I get frustrated with the parents around here too. Women who ask why I don’t have kids at my age and that it’s so weird and ask me everyday if I'm pregnant or when I’m going to get pregnant (not cute or funny anymore). My next door neighbor who lets her kids scream at her and in return calls her kids the Dominican version of the F-word what seems like every five minutes. My favorite little girl Jelenyi from church who has no dad in the picture and a mom who got married this summer and moved away with her new husband and baby to a house that is too small to fit Jelenyi in and left her behind with grandpa and grandma who live around the corner from us - Jelenyi and other kids from the neighborhood who just can’t get enough love are constantly on our doorstep and it breaks my heart. The families who sell their girls into prostitution and sex slavery who then start getting pregnant as pre-teens delivering babies who are thrown into the cycle of poverty and trafficking or orphanages all over again. The woman who works for the adoption agency here who tells me that my husband and I are just not old enough to start a Dominican adoption here despite all the time and effort we have put into this and all the while, there is a 12 year in my town who is pregnant with her third, yes third, baby and gets to keep it. And while one part of me wants to scream at all these people, I think the bigger part of me is just scared too. Scared to have a baby in this country, scared to have another miscarriage, scared to have another D&C performed by someone who doesn’t speak a word of English. It’s not always just a fun adventure here, and I’m not as fearless as some people seem to think I might be.
So please pray for us in this transition period. I know God has a plan for us, and that He will take care of our needs. I can’t say enough how much your prayers and support mean to both of us. Please pray for our marriage, for this upcoming school year, that we can find a new home, and that we can bring Christ’s love and joy and peace into the lives we encounter, even when we might not be feeling so joyful ourselves. Also I just found out that a former co-worker and friend, Miss Amanda from Bay Cliff Camp passed away this month at the young age of 25 from ovarian cancer. Please pray for peace for her family.
Forgive me for being out of touch for so long, and for the waaay too long and less than upbeat blog entry (kudos to those of you who made it all the way to the end :) Please keep writing with updates of what is happening with all of you in the different places you are reading from. Thank you again for all of your love and support all the time.
Love, peace, and prayers,
Kristin
